How To Get a Migraine in Six Easy Steps

1 - Make sure both of your kids are on spring break, so you have them all week without a break (break seems like such an oxymoron)
2 - Make sure that not only is your husband out of town, but he is also out of the country, so whenever you call him he is unable to talk because he is just running out for drinks
3 - Decide to visit your best pal from college who lives 6 hour drive away
4 - Get the crazy idea that the two of you should drive another 2 hours to take your four kids to an amusement park for the afternoon
5 - Try to deal with the anger & misbehaviour of your completely unmanageable five year old and realize for the millionth time that you are a terrible parent
6 - Get lost in the Central Valley on the way home (there aren't any turns off of 1-5 but somehow you manage not only to find one, but to go at least 30 miles before you realize your mistake)

Sad

So I'm really sad about the whole kindergarten thing. I haven't been this sad since my college boyfriend dumped me. I'm even listening to Jackson Browne again! Ok, so it probably isn't reasonable to be this sad. But here's the deal. We have a perfectly reasonable back up in the local Catholic school, where some of our friends are very happy. But the fact that we worked so hard over the past two years, touring schools, attending events, etc. and that not only did we not get offered any private school spots but we were also assigned to a public kindergarten in the projects knocks the wind out of you. I'm definitely not begrudging my friends who had better news. I'm honestly happy that it worked out for somebody. But I'm also not sure how much I can hear about it.

some funny things my kids said lately

the whole kindergarten search has been such a nightmare, I can't even write about it. so I'm just going to put down some of the funny things that my kids have said lately and try to pretend that the rest of it doesn't exist:

Miles (who is reading the Magic Treehouse book about the Civil War) was talking about the "Connecticut" soldiers (instead of Confederate)

Mia was talking about the "lizard" of oz.

Then today she took a hard look at Miles' Curious George doll and said, "Curious George has a vagina."

Which turned into Miles yelling, "No he has a penis."

"Vagina"

"Penis"

"Vagina"

"Penis"

You get the idea. Even in my fragile emotional state, I had a good laugh!